what did I do?

This afternoon I just got STRESSED! I think trying to get dinner together before we had to go to Aleena's bad concert while everyone was wanting me to help with their costumes and do homework and Trey didn't get his carpool ride home from band and Jack E was totally a fuss and....

Yeah I was stressed. I was putting together a stew for dinner. D said he didn't think it would be ready in time. I assured him it would. Then I realized like 5 minutes later that it wouldn't. Now I have to figure out how to feed us dinner in about 10 minutes. Ummmmm....I got a loaf of wheat french bread from the freezer, a jar of italian tomato sauce from the pantry and pepperoni shredded cheese from the fridge. Sliced that bread up and made little pizzas.

It was fine for everyone. Except remember that I am stressed out? I think I ate 3 slices of the stuff. It was not light on the cheese. I had pepporoni. So much for motivation. Oh...and I am totally bloated now too.

Tuesday already?

It's been crazy around here the past couple of days. We had a good weekend. It was busy picking up, cleaning up and hanging out with friends. Yesterday was a great one for me. I walked early, went to work, helped kids with homework, made a big dinner, cleaned the kitchen (again!) and watched D carve 3 pumpkins with the kids. This morning I had a nasty headache so I didn't get up to walk. I decided to sleep another hour instead. I will go tomorrow morning even though I have to leave for work by 7. It just means I have to be organized tonight so I don't have much to do in the morning except for get myself ready. Tonight Aleena has a band concert so we have to do dinner quickly and then get out the door for that. Thankfully the school is 2 blocks away so we can push it til the last minute.

So, foodwise how was the weekend? I felt so So SO very motivated after my weigh in. I came home and had my bagel and just 1 bite of a doughnut as I threw the last one in the trash. We were picking up and I was just so crabby with the kids. I decided to go for a walk before we had to get ready to go to our friends'. That was really good for me. I walked the path by our house and ran some. I got in 45 minutes so I felt really good about that. My friend had made pumpkin muffins so she didn't really want pumpkin cookies. She was getting ready to make brownies, too, so there was that. I was kind of worried about how I would do walking into the door to snacky foods. I decided to stop and get a soy chai at Starbucks. Besides then I could say hello to my hubby!

The chai left me with a yuumy sweet taste in my mouth, I felt warm and I really wasn't hungry for a while. It was a splurge at 5 points, but I typically use a lot of flex on the weekends for those kinds of treats. It worked. There were no "snacks" out except for pumpkin chocolate chip muffins and corn bread muffins. I wasn't interested in those thanks to that sweet feeling I already had going on. I did have some chili, but skipped the sour cream and cheese and corn chips. I ate half of Jack E's brownie and some of Emma's ice cream cone, but I didn't get into my flexies too terribly badly.

Sunday I did really well with food choices too. We had friends over for pizza and I made a big ol' salad. I ate a ton of that and just a tiny square of pizza. It disappeared pretty fast so there wasn't much temptaion! My trouble came with Emma's homemade brownies! I had one and then nibbled a little when I was cleaning up. I counted it as 2 brownies. So I dipped into my flexies a little more, but I also overestimated for what I ate, too.

Yesterday I was so hungry in the afternoon. I ate my lunch early at work and then was really hungry in the afternoon while everyone was getting home from school I had some cottage cheese and some other little snacks. I didn't leave myself many points for dinner. But by then I wasn't really hungry! I made a salad for me and ate a little of the other stuff with the family. My trouble came (again!) when everyone was standing around planning their Jack-o-lanterns and eating a cookie or two. Trey and I finished off the last of the brownies!!! That means that I had half of 2 of them. I like the middles and he likes the edges. Not bad considering the munchies I had all afternoon. I drank a TON of water yesterday too. It just felt good to drink it yesterday.

I am trying to focus on the Good Health Guidelines this week. I don't always get enough protein or dairy so I am working on that. I know that maintenance is coming. I keep thinking of how I will be eating in a few more weeks when I am not trying to lose anymore. I know that if it weren't for WW, I would probably quit right now and decide that this was good enough. But since I set out with that goal of 150, I am determined to get there. And I am determined to stay there, too.

I feel like I am kind of rambling now.

Halloween is tomorrow and I am not sure what I will do with the treats. We don't have anything in our "pass out" bowl that is tempting me. But what about the stuff they bring home? I think I will leave myself some points for a treat but then really REALLY consider if I want a treat or not. Is it worth it? I sooooo want to be at my goal this week. I highly doubt it will happen, but I still want to lose 3.6 pounds this week. You know I will be weighing in on this side of naked, don't you?!?! LOL

weigh in update

I was down 2 whole pounds today. Thank GOD!!! It is so hard to be sitting here so very close to goal. I am less than 4 pounds from my WW goal...that is soooo close. The bummer is I don't think I will be there be next week which was a goal of mine. But I will be able to say that I have lost 40 pounds next week. And that will still be a great thing. At least I hope so, huh, Becky?

So I keep plugging away, knowing that maintenance will start for me very soon. I'll be there right at the holidays. How great it will be to be thin at the holidays this year and know that I will be in control and not gaining weight. I sure hope anyway. At least not a gain like i have had in the past anyway.

Just went to the store after my meeting and brought home doughnuts for the kiddos...and a fresh bagel for me. That is my weekend indulgence, a fresh bakery bagel...not an alternative, 1 point one, though those are fine for during the week. But now I have to get the kids to finish off the doughnuts before I dip into them. It's one of those things that I would just eat because it's sitting there...and then before I know it the bite has turned into 2 and a half doughnuts! So I just won't take a bite, rught? Not get the taste in my mouth. Because those grocery store things are really NOT worth it.

Time to pick up and get these kiddos motivated to do something around here. We're going to see some friends tonight and watch the World Series game with them. We're having chili there. And I am going to either take the evil pumpkin cookies to share or take the stuff and bake them there. That way I know I can have a little dessert and know EXACTLY what I am in for. This has always been my super skinny friend. Even after having 4 kids, she was still like a size 6. But she has always had really amazing eating habits. Tons of fruits and veggies...lean meats...total moderation. Then they moved here and she has relied on more and more fast food. She gained a little...but then lost a bunch last summer, too. (I inspired my skinny friend to lose weight!)

So all that to say, her house is pretty safe food wise. She doesn't have a lot of junk around...and we both push fruit for snacks for our kids so there are always an abundance of "healthy choices" around. Not really too worried about the night. Unless she makes guacamole. Hers is totally awesome. And then I eat it with chips so just totally too much munching. I guess I could actually put it on a plate and have a serving instead of standing over the bowl just mindlessly eating, huh? Maybe I'll try that! LOL

I just put those pumpkin cookies through the recipe builder using the nutrionals from the spice cake mix that I use. They came out to 2 points each!!! Maybe that is why I gained a pound the week before last when I was having 2 or 3 a day and calling them all one point!

Friday is for being lazy

I'm just doing a lot of sitting around today, I swear. Little bit of laundry...pick up a little...that's about it. I've been reading all the blogs I try to keep up with. One got me thinking about how food can have such power over me sometimes.

I was reading here about her love of the baked goods, especially brownies. I can so totally relate. I have been there so many times. I totally love my baked goods along with a diet Coke to wash it all down! LOL

But it's amazing to me that I can go for so long without it being an issue for me. You know those brownies that gave me trouble on the weekend? The last few are still in the pan on my dining room table. Thay have been moved for dinner and replaced, but no one in my family has gotten into them. Why? Why are they not getting to me now? Did I just get my fill the other night? As I sit here now thinking of them, they just don't sound very appetizing either.

Another thing...this morning on the way to the bus stop, my thin neighbor who always goes to the gym right after her girls get on the bus, tells me how great I am looking. She's lived here about 3 and a half years...saw me before pregnancy #6, during that, and in my postpartum size 18 glory days. She knows that I really do look good now! :p We were talking about something, and she asked if I had sampled one of the "treats" her girls had made and "boo-ed" us with. WARNING: This description may cause cravings in some of you. They are little waffle shaped pretzels with a pecan half "glued" on with melted chocolate. I warned you!

The little bag of them has been sitting on my counter for over a week. Some of my kids have had 1 or 2, some are not into the nut thing. I have looked at them a couple of times, and, honestly, they make my teeth hurt to look at them. I also think that if I had one I would eat the rest of them. Then I would have the whole guilt thing and post sugar binge crash thing. It just doesn't seem worth it.

This is such a new thing for me. I have been the biggest binge eater most of my life. I have spent countless nights on the couch I am currently blogging from devouring entire pints of Ben and Jerry's or Dreamery or whatever ice cream I could find. I guess this is the beginnig of getting rid of my "fat girl" mentality. Those treats don't seem worth it. Or like the other day, I get a craving so I make a more healthful alternative.

I still have my issues, trust me. But maybe longer stretches between binges means I really am making progress.

BTW, I just scared the HELL out of my hubby. He came home from work a little while ago and I told him, I would seriously do about anything for some fries and ketchup. Keep in mind that I have been puking, tired and waaaaay moody. I am also currently having my TOM so no worries...but it's funny to see the look on his face.

I think I am just craving a different kind of crap from baked goods. The good news? I have nothing similar to a McDonald's in my kitchen and it would take MUCH convincing of myself to get in the car and drive the mile and a half to the nearest McD's. Then again, Burger King and Wendy's are closer!!!

Just kidding! And yes, mom, I am SURE I am NOT pregnant!

the flu again?

So the lentil soup sounded good to some of you? I may never eat it again since I wound up with the flu once again in the night after we had it. I'll spare you the details, but I spent the hours from midnight till noon on Wednesday making sure my stomach was empty. It was a different bug from last time though! :o) It only lasted for the 12 hours or so. I slept most of the day yesterday, went to work today and now could go to bed for the night.

I think D has about had enough of my being sick. He doesn't like it, he says. When I am sick, he says he gets crabby and sad. He did kick the kids' butts into doing a bunch of chores yesterday though. Thank goodness! And he made dinner last night. And we are having leftovers tonight. I guess my life isn't ALL bad!

I have walked twice this week so far with my neighbor. We are going for 50 minutes. I skipped Wednesday and chose puking instead as my activity. Then this morning, I stayed in bed till the last possible second. Good thing, too, since I was a little dizzy and out of it with the babies today. I actually turned on Baby Einsteins for them. Never done that before! But tomorrow we are back out there for our early walk. I was dreaming about running last night. How weird is that!?

I really want to be at goal soon. At least my WW goal of 150. I just feel so flabby and out of it these past few days. I guess it's the TOM thing. This morning I put on my new jeans, and they fit just fine...not tight at all. So why do I feel like a chubby girl tonight?

Check back with you all tomorrow!!!

delayed gratification

Not something I am normally good at, but today I did it! D brought home a slice of banana nut bread for one of the kiddos to have as a snack. jack E nibbled on it, but then just left it on the counter. IT was sitting there...calling to me. I did break off one little crumb to taste. It was sooooo sweet! So I decided to make some low point banana muffins that I had been looking at online.

I was at Roni's site looking at these whole wheat banana muffins. But I had to tweak them a little to my taste. I'm not crazy about nuts, so I left those off. I left out the applesause and added an extra banana. I used my nonfat vanilla yogurt instead of plain. And I just used 1 Tbsp of brown sugar to sweeten it. Oh, and I used 1/4 c fat free egg substitute instead of the egg whites.

It made 6 big muffins, 2 points each...and really quite yummy! I will probably throw these the last 5 in the freezer and make another batch since I have 2 more black bananas on my counter. But I am so glad I didn't grab the overly sweet, 410 calorie, 17 gram of fat slice that was on my counter!

Some of the blog talk has been about getting out of the same ruts for dinner. I'll share what we will be having. I've been making this for a few years. I started doing it because it was cheap and filling...and it's lasted because it's low in fat, high in fiber and full of veggies.

Crock Pot Lentil Soup

i chopped onion
3 chopped carrots
2 stalks chopped celery, including leafy tops
1 clove garlic, minced
1 large bell pepper, chopped
4 potatoes, diced
1 tsp oregano
1 tsp basil
1 Bay leaf
10 cups water
2 cups dry lentils
1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes
salt and pepper to taste

That's it. Just throw it all in the crock pot and let it cook all day...probably 6-8 hours on low or 4-5 on high. Today I didn't use potatoes because I had some winter squash I needed to use. I may or may not add some fresh spinach at the end just til it wilts. I like to add a splash or two of vinegar to my bowl. The kids don't do that. And D the carnivore is working late, so tonight we are vegan!

This does make a TON. My 6 quart crock pot is pretty full, but I like the leftovers for lunches. And I adapt this all the time to just whatever I have on hand and what needs to be used. It's kind of like the WW Zero point soup that way...except this has tons of fiber and more protein from the lentils.

Hope somebody (beside me!) likes this one.

confessions

I had great intentions yesterday. Then I ran to the store with the kids after Trey's lacrosse game. It was all fine and good until the checkout. Trey saw the big display of Doritos Collisions. It has two flavors in one bag. Hot Wings and Blue Cheese just sounded toooooo yummy. I thought, no problem, I'll have a few and call it a day.

I did have a few...in the car on the way home. If I would have stopped then, I would have been happy. But the problem with junk food like that is that it's actually processed and produced to make you want more and More and MORE! And because there are two flavors in each bag, I felt like I needed to eat them in pairs. Hot Wings then Blue Cheese. But I didn't so much like the Blue Cheese flavor to end, so then I would grab another Hot Wing chip. UGH! The good news? Trey finished off the bag yesterday afternoon. Wonder if he feels as gross as I do?

My other confession? After dinner last night ("crummy" chicken, broccoli, mashed potatoes, pureed winter squash and a HUGE salad for mama), we cut into Emma's brownies. She made brownies from scratch on Friday afternoon. I was so proud! Watching her melt the butter and unsweetened chocolate on the stove. I was so glad that she realized that brownies are easy to make with just a few ingredients...and no box! That's my personal soapbox, sorry!

I would have been OK with no brownie...or maybe just a little nibble to get the chocolate taste. But since they were sitting in front of me? Yeah, I had that little nibble. Then I had to even out the little section where I cut off my nibble. Then another little nibble. And another. I wound up eating basically 3 brownies!!! The good news? Because I didn't have the right size pan, these were super thin...and according to the recipe, we should have had 16 brownies from that pan. So my indiscretion was only equal to 1 1/2 brownies. Thank GOD! Still not feeling great about that though.

Note to self...one serving of Doritos or one brownie per day is adequate!

So I thought I would get up and do a walk this morning to help in the recovery process. OK, just to alleviate a little of my guilt. It was snowing!!! I thought, it's OK, I can still go. Yeah, I lasted 5 minutes, down my street and back again. It wasn't that it was that cold, it was the wet snow hitting my face that got to me. So if it clears up, I really want to go out later today.

D was given club level tickets to the Broncos game for tonight. Lucky him. We aren't even really football fans here. He's more excited to know that there is a comped buffet there more than anything else. And he can watch the game from inside so he'll be out of the snow. So if you see the game tonight, think of my dh sitting there pigging out on free food! And me at home on the couch with my kiddos...reading the same 3 books to Jack E over and over and over again.

a gain? that sucks!

Yeah, I'm up one pound this week. I know this week has been less than stellar...and I honestly feel quite bloated and yucky. Think that TOM thing is looming. Maybe that's all it is?

Anyway, my goal for this week is to be more diligent in my tracking. I know that I slacked a little there last week. And I do want to get back to getting in those walks. That may be an issue since we are supposed to get a storm tonight and tomorrow. I was going to get up this morning and walk, but Kelli was in my bed and I didn't sleep well. I think I must have turned my alarm off instead of just hitting the snooze.

So now instead of being just inside my last 5 pounds, I am just over the last 5 pounds. It is still my goal to get that done in the next 2 weeks. YIKES! That is a lot.

It was so fun to see my blog friend the law student at my meeting this morning. She is too cute and really fun. It was cool to link my cyber weight loss world with my real life a little bit. Since I feel so close to all of you sometimes. Getting a little sappy now. Must be TOM! LOL

OK. Gotta make Emma some waffles. I'm sure she'll want chocolate chips in them too. I already had my pumpkin bread so I need to NOT eat any waffles. Wish me luck with that!

pumpkin cookies

These are from Becky's blog. Totally simple...and pretty tasty, too.

1 spice cake mix
1 15 oz can pumpkin
3/4 c chocolate chips

Combine. Drop by spoonfuls on cookie sheet. Bake at 350 for 18-20 minutes. Makes 3 dozen cookies, 1 point each.

Hope you like them...anonymous!

the source of my stress

We as a family have been going through some stuff for the past few years. In fact, tomorrow is the third anniversary from really the start of a lot of issues for us. I don't need to go into it all now. Believe me, it's a long story that really barely makes sense to my hubby and I let alone our extended families, IRL friends or cyber friends.

I have been really struggling with it a lot this week. And my TOM is coming soon. I swear my oldest daughter has PMS as well even though she hasn't started that whole thing yet. The babies I nanny for and their family have had the flu. So I've been puked on and holding a little one nearly incessantly. Oh, and working a little extra so their mama could rest. And D, my husband, can't seem to shake the flu thing. He's not nearly as sick as I was. He's just been a little sick for like 2 weeks.

As I look back on my food journal this week, it hasn't been as crazy bad with the points as I would have thought. Kelli and Jack E both had their birthday last Saturday...so there was a chocolate cupcake...and lots of buttercream frosting. (Just can't do frosting from the can. Have you read the ingredients on that stuff? NASTY!!!)

But I have had some really bad snacks each afternoon this week. Like pretzels and spinach dip. Or Doritos. But then I really haven't eaten dinner afterwards. So less than the best nutrition, but it has kind of evened out. Today? I had some carrots, one of Becky's 1 point pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, and a 1 point chai for a snack. Much better choices.

I walked with my neighbor on Monday morning, but then she went out of town...and my motivation went with her. I stayed in bed til the last possible second each day. This morning I got up with D and the big boys who went to the farm. I hung out with my laptop even though I told myself I would walk this morning. After like an hour, I had a little epiphany. The food and exercise things are about the only things I really have control over right now. So I put on my sweats and sneakers and went for my walk. I just kept thinking about that the whole time I was out there. This walking thing...pushing myself...that is something that ONLY I can control. So when I feel like it's all falling down around me, I will committ to taking care of ME.

I will weigh in on Saturday morning like usual. Not sure how that will go. I am close to my WW goal. And then I joined in with Carolyn and Randi for a challenge to keep us all motivated through the holiday season. It is my goal to be at my high school weight by Christmas. And then to stay there for the new year, too! I think that is pretty amazing to think that at 37 and a mama to 6 kids that I could be back at that point. Not like I was thin then or anything. But it does feel good to wear a MEDIUM shirt...and find pants that easily fit and AREN'T in the "ladies" section of the store.

Rambling now...and it's time for me to start dinner. Just wanted to check in with you all and let you know that I have issues. But I am working through them the best I can.

lack of posting

There are times when I don't post much because life is just busy.

Then there are times like now when I feel totally off track and I just don't want to talk about it.

*sigh*

wow...my bathroom scale sucks!

I don't know you all do the weigh in at home. This morning I don't think I was really down at all from last week on my bathroom scale, but at my WW meeting I was down 1.8! So glad that is the official one! And I am now less than 5 pounds from my WW goal and less than 10 pounds from my personal/Christmas Challenge goal.

Oh. My. Gosh!!!

It's hard to believe that I am so close...and it feels sooooooo good.

At the beginning of Septeber, our leader asked us to set a goal for the end of October. SInce we are Saturday weighers, it's actually Noveber 3 for us. My discouraged goal at that point was to get back to my lowest so far which had been 158. After getting a little more motivated I decided to set my sights on starting Lifetime by that time. I have 3 weeks and 4.6 pounds to go. So exciting to know it's doable. And then I want to lose 5 more pounds before Christmas. That will take me back to around where I was in high school.

My leader today asked me why I want to get to that high school number. Honestly, part of my answer was "why not?" After 20 years and having 6 kids I think it would be fun to know that I weigh now what I did when I was 17 . Then, too, the highest weight on the WW chart for my hight (when I lied and said I was 5'5"!) is 150. My goal of 145 gives me 5 pounds of wiggle room.

What do you all think of that?

what was I thinking?

Going for a walk with a runner that is. Sure I was doing a nice long walk each morning for a few weeks a while back, but this chick usually JOGS so her pace is a little more than I am used to.

And it just goes to show, that even though I may weigh less than her, she is in waaaaay better shape than I am.

We're going again on Monday.

"Do you exercise?"

This is the question my down the street neighbor asked me at the bus stop this morning. I guess she usually goes out for a run in the mornings, but now since it's dark at 5:30 she'd like to have a partner.

I was just thinking this morning that I need to get my booty out there walking again. I really enjoy that time, I know it helps my weight loss, but it's DARK. So I am going to go with my neighbor a few times a week...starting tomorrow. She has to be home by 6:30 when her hubby leaves for work. I need to be home by 6:30 to make sure the kids are getting ready for school. So it will work for both of us. But it's going to be dark at 5:40 when I go out to the corner to meet her.

So all you young 'uns out there who can go to the gym after work...no kids schedules to juggle around...no afterschool stuff like lessons or homework or lacrosse practice...go to the gym for me, OK? 'Cuz I'll be getting up at 5:30 (when it's still DARK) to go for a walk with my neighbor.

And BTW, we are just walking tomorrow...no running for me. Yet!

mexican food

UGH!!! It's one of those things I crave. Especially when I'm pregnant. I love the combo of tomato and lettuce and cheese and the crunch of chips with the creamy sour cream. yum! On Sunday we were supposed to have lunch with a friend. It didn't work out, but we decided to go to our favorite local mexican place. I showed much restraint. Had my chips and salsa. Then got a really low fat burrito and only had half of it. I had the other half on Monday for lunch.

Yesterday I was totally craving that burrito again! My FIL came into town for a quick visit last night. He offered to take us to dinner. I JUMPED on it. We really rarely go out, both for financial reasons (these kids cost a LOT to feed) and the fact that we can make better, more healthful food at home. But it really is a treat for mama! So that same mexican place has kids eat free on Tuesday nights. Just all the more incentive to go there.

D decided we should just walk. It's only about a mile round trip, and it was beautiful out. So we walked. I decided I would have my same burrito again....only eat half of it. (Funny thing is, after all my munching yesterday, I really wasn't even very hungry for dinner. It would have been the night when I had some salad and veggies and little else had we eaten at home!) And I decided to not have any chips and salsa. I'd had my fix a couple days before. I could do without this time.

BUT before we were even seated, the server brings out this plate of mushroom salsa. It's really different. It has diced mushrooms, onion, jalapeno, cilantro and lime. I LOVE the stuff. I had some. They don't always have it there, and we always ask for it every time we go so the servers all know we love it. Then I really wasn't very hungry for dinner. But I ordered my burrito just the same. Also a different thing. It has sauteed mushrooms and spinach, white rice, black beans and a little cheese. Then it's just covered in a little salsa and lettuce. I only ate about a third of it last night. And the rest made a really yummy lunch today!

I've eaten more than I should have the past day and a half, and I am feeling it. I am thirsty and just feel full right now. I DON'T have the munchies today, that's for sure!

I do think I know what part of my problem was yesterday. I was really tired. I still am, actually. (A sign that TOM is on it's way...) I finally realized that my desire to eat was just from fatigue. I rested on the couch for about 45 minutes and felt a little better. That desire to eat when I am tired is one of the things that kept me as a new mama (for an entire decade) overweight. I don't know what it is, but being tired makes me just crave carbs and my diet coke. So today, I am trying to drink water and have given myself permission to rest and hang out. Tomorrow I will have my "nanny" babies, and extra toddler, and my 2 youngest home for the day. Five kids, 4 of whom are in diapers, and 3 who aren't verbal. Should be fun!!! I think the rest will do me good today! LOL

I am still craving pumpkin-y things. I want to look around on line and see what other recipes I can find. I am making my delicata squash tonight. Hopefully that will fill a starchy void in my belly.

just want to munch!!!

Don't know what my problem is today, but I totally just want to eat my way through the day. I have seriously been planning my lunch and dinner since breakfast! Yesterday we all chowed down on the pumpkin bread. The first loaf is gone and the second loaf is still in the freezer where it needs to stay for a while. I think that day of too many carbs which then led me to crave more diet coke than I've been drinking lately has me a little whacked out today.

I did make a poached egg for breakfast this morning. It was the first one I ever made. I liked it. I need to to that again I think. I also had a WW blueberry bar. And I've had a bowl of one point soup. Honestly fewer points in so far today than the past few days by this time. I've been eating bagels for breakfast. The real, big, fresh from the bakery bagels. Love them. But a lot of points and not a lot of anything else. So I'm trying a new approach to my breakfast.

But I'm hungry right now. I'm trying to stay busy till lunch then I'll try to eat something balanced and filling. Dinner tonight? Grilled pork chops, brussels sprouts, delicata squash and probably roasted potatoes.

I'm totally craving this burrito thing I had on Sunday at a local mexican place. It was a mushroom burrito...sauteed mushrooms, sauteed spinach, black beans, rice and a little cheese. I had half on Sunday and the rest yesterday. It was so yummy. Also craving the spinach salad I had this weekend. Just spinach, tomato and feta. Maybe that should be part of my lunch. mmmmm.

See what I mean? I am totally thinking about food today!

pumpkin bread

totally craving it the past few days. I guess it's just the October thing. And then whenever I visit Kate's blog I totally think pumpkin!

I saw pumpkin ice cream at the store on Saturday. And they had the slow churned, half the fat. I bought some. I thought it might be the end of me, but I had one giant scoop Saturday evening (with the kids) and haven't touched it since. Of course, it's still in there so I won't brag too much yet. I could end up any night on the couch with the half gallon and the spoon! But I won't...because I don't really want to go back there.

Anyway. I've been craving pumpkin bread. The recipe I normally make is totally yummy, but I know it's high in points. I didn't want to go there this time. And I've tried Roni's carrot pumpkin bread that's only 2 points. But hers starts with a cake mix and I am just really going through a personal thing with processed foods. Save that for another day.

So I cruised around on all recipes for a while looking for ideas. I combined some ideas and tried to choose low fat options whenever I could. I put it through the recipe builder and it came out to 2 points per slice, 12 slices from the loaf. I did actually double all this when I did it and just used a small can of pumpkin (15 oz). And I added some dried cranberries, too. It's really orange-y and different from my other pumpkin bread. It's yummy, but definitely has a low fat texture. For me, it's totally a keeper.

Orange Pumpkin Bread

Mix and Set Aside:
1 cup flour
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
2 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp allspice
2 tsp cinnamon

In another bowl, beat together:
1/2 cup applesauce
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup egg substitue (eg Egg Beaters)
1 cup canned pumpkin
1 orange (quarted, then pulsed in a food processor)

Add wet ingedients to dry, mix till just combined.

Bake at 350 for 50 minutes.

weigh in

So it was more than a pound. I gained 2.6 pounds. But I am still down over 3 pounds from 2 weeks ago. I'm good with that.

I still wear a size 10 jeans!!!

never done this before!

I'm sitting here typing this post in a way I never have before. I am weaing size 10 jeans, my friends!!! I have never, ever, ever owned a oair if size 10 jeans. I barely ever even fit into a size 12 after I was married! And if that weren't enough, I could go upstairs and put on the size 8 skirt I just bought. A SIZE 8!!!

Total shock that THIS is my body! It's jiggly since I haven't walked in a couple of weeks. It's not the leanest it could be even with this number on the scale. But I feel at home in this body and I am just shocked that I have found it under all my chubbiness.

I also bought Halloween candy today with Jack E and Kelli. Nothing I really like. Little mini peeps, gummi body parts and gummy "food court" food, monster head ring lollipops and some mini dum-dums. Doesn't sound very appealing, does it? Exactly my goal!

Then we bought a pack of dark chocolate peanut M&M's to share. And they actually let me have 5 of them. They were very yummy...and I am so glad to have my kiddos to share the junk with. So much easier to not over do it!

I"m thinking I'll weigh in about a pound heavier than last week. I'm good with that, since I had barely eaten the day before last week..and hadn't eaten the two days before THAT. Again, let me say the flu SUCKS! But I also have kept myself at my one morning diet Coke. It would be so easy to go grab a super huge one right now, but I know it's not good for me, so I am really trying to just have one a day.

Happy weekend all!

holding on

I've been playing around with stuff here. When I updated my ticker, I thought the pirate-y theme was totally cute! So then I changed the rest of things to be a little more match-y. Just did a little Meez for my sidebar too. Can you believe with all those shoe choices, I couldn't find flip flops? So that's what I look like all spiffed up! Normally I'm barefoot in my kitchen! LOL

The scale has been holding steady at 154-155. That is so strange. I am still more used to seeing the 160's, and now to be in the mid 150's is a little odd, but I LOVE it! I have been trying to get in all my good health guidelines and just follow my hunger. I did eat over my 23 points by a couple the past few days, but I have been a little more active those days too. Nothing crazy. Just actually doing some laundry instead of lying on the couch all day feeling miserable.

I can hardly believe that I will be starting my WW maintenance soon, but I will. Just in time for the holidays I can focus on just maintaining and not losing anymore. And I really feel like 145 may be as low as I want to go. I wonder if I could get into the 130's? Then again, I don't think I want to have to maintain such a low number. I do like to eat!

Speaking of which, it's time to get some lunch into the little ones around here!

what's happened to me?

I did make it to weigh in on Saturday morning. It was a huge loss...6.2 pounds. I was just barely getting to the point of drinking and starting to eat again. I fully expect a gain of a pound or two this week just to make up for all the lost fluids, etc. that I am making up.

I am feeling better but still am really weak and have an earahce with both ears now. Go figure! And my oldest boy has been home from school yesterday and today with the beginnings of the sickness. I'll be good as long as he doesn't puke!

So I really have given up most of my diet coke habit. I have had 1 can at home each morning since Saturday. That is it. I have been drinking my water, but not even as much as I did before I had the flu. In fact, I'm not eating nearly as much as I did before the flu at all. I always would eat 26-28 points a day, with some days being waaaay over that. With this loss, I am down to 23 points a day (from 24) and I have yet to eat all of them any day this week. Of course my activity is way down, too, so maybe that has something to do with it?

On Sunday I was just craving some comfort food. I had a WW frozen thing with noodles and broccoli and a cheesy sauce. I put a boca chicken patty on it to add more protein. I could only finish about half of it. Then I was so thirsty (because of all that sodium I'm sure) so I had a big glass of water. Then my belly thought it would burst I was so full. I have always eaten a TON of food. This is so strange to just eat such a tiny bit and be satisfied. I'm not doing as well with my fruits and veggies as I was before. I need to work on that.

I'm srarting to ramble I think.

It is pretty exciting to see that I am fully and securely in the 150's! It's rather shocking to be the same number I was when I got married fifteen years ago. Of course this body has been through 6 pregnancies so it looks just a LITTLE different...but still. I am getting really close to my goal. My goal for the first weigh in of November was to get to 158. Then I got more confident and decided to set that goal for 150, my WW goal. Looks like I will make it to that!!! Can't hardly believe it!