still stressed out

I'm still feeling the stress. This morning is particularly bad. But I tried to just enjoy my walk this morning. Last night I did get in a few minutes of yoga, too.

I will have a houseful of kids today...more than just my 6. Aleena has a friend here and is planning a "show" with the neighborhood girls. My twins I nanny for may stop by with their mama for a while this morning just to visit (while their dog is at the fertility vet having a "sample" taken-ew!). Then my friend has a work conflict this afternoon so her 3 yo daughter and 7 yo son will be here a couple of hours.

And my goal is to get my laundry done and wood floors scrubbed today, too.

Right now I just want to sit on the couch. *sigh*

Happy day all!

weigh in this week

It has been a hard week. I have done sooooo much stress eating. I knew my weigh in would be bad and I was prepared to face that music. I did gain 2.6. I didn't update any of my stats anywhere since I am too tired tonight.

Even with a gain, I have lost over 28 pounds. That's nothing to be ashamed of, right?! I went shopping yesterday for a new swimsuit. I didn't get one...I only tried 1 on. But I did get some shorts and strappy little tanks. The great thing about having six kids in 10 years and carrying a baby or toddler (or both) for an hour of two each day? My shoulders are HOT! I can totally get away with those little tops even though I still have some baby belly.

I am tired tonight. We've had a long weekend and it just took me like 45 minutes to log into blogger...what's my deal tonight?

But I did want to post and say, even though I ate my way through last week, I feel good about myself. I have realized (last Thursday even) that I was stress eating. I have gotten back to walking a few times a week...and I'm thinking I might pull out my yoga DVD. That's a much better way to deal with my stress, don't you think?

is that scale wrong?

I'm not talking about my bathroom scale. I mean the WW scale. I've been having loss after loss, but I just feel gross these past few days. We were sitting by the river on Sunday afternoon and I just felt FAT! Maybe it's that I just haven't been making good choices lately. Too many processed foods and not enough fruits and vegetables. And I haven't been walking lately either. After having the flu at the end of May and then a nasty cold and then going out of town with D, I just haven't made time for it.

I did go out for a walk today. It made me tired...but it felt so good.

I will post later tonight with my menu...and I've been tagged so I need to play that. But right now Kelli is having a melt down, so no time for cognitive thought right now!!!

getting closer all the time

I can't believe I lost another pound!!!

This hasn't been the greatest week as far as what I've eaten. I have "over done it" a few too many times, but I have tried to just not eat as much in the middle of the day and really make sure I get my water. It worked!!!

D and I had a great time away for a couple of days. We were definitely on the budget trip this time. We were in a borrowed cabin, and we did all our own cooking. The good thing about that is that I had much more control over what I ate...which I think is why I still had a loss. We even bought a half gallon of ice cream on our anniversary to eat while we watched a movie. We each had a big bowl....OK, mine was a HUGE bowl. But I counted it in my daily points (actually flex points!!!). And honestly, I don't think that huge bowl of ice cream was any more point-wise than a big ol' restaurant dessert would have been. That's what I love about eating in. I end up consuming less points that way, I thiink. Even when I eat filet mignon (we brought from home...we bought a quarter of beef last year so we've got some good stuff!), baked potato and salad.

I have changed how I've structured my days lately too. I always would have a big lunch, with sandwich, pretzels, veggies, and fruit that cost me about 7-9 points. I have been eating less in the middle of the day and find that I am still doing fine as far as not pigging out later. I think I'll go back to posting my menu this week so you can see what I am eating...becuase I know you are all DYING to know what I eat!!! LOLOLOL

Happy weekend all! We are having a brew party this afternoon. D is teaching some guys how to brew beer at home. And there will be plenty of "beer food" around too. I'm making hot wings and BBQ meatballs...a friend is bringing brats. And I'm sure there will be plenty of beer drinking going on as well! That's not my thing at all, thankfully!

my daughter is a bad infulence!

Aleena is like me. She loves to cook and experiment in the kitchen. That is also one way that she can show her love to her family...by making us something special. Last week I came home from work and she had made this pasta dish with a lemony olive oil sauce. It was quite interesting, and she had just made it up from the things she found in the kitchen. She was up to baking this afternoon so today's "something special" was problematic for mama.

Aleena was following a recipe in her junior cook book. She was to use cherry pie filling and refrigerated pie crusts to make little turnover things. They were very yummy...at least my 2 oldest boys thought so. And mama had a couple too many. uh-oh!

I should have been saving myself but I pigged out. Now I feel gross, but what can I do now other than beat myself up about it? And they were really yummy! LOL

I said I should have been saving myself...D told me over the weekend (or earlier maybe?) that he has found a little cabin for us to borrow for a couple of nights this week. It is our 15th wedding anniversary on Wednesday...and we will get to be ALONE in the mountains! YEAH!!!

I have no idea what we will be eating or how we will be spending our time. I probably should have saved a few flex points for that, huh? I ate them all this weekend so I'm just in trouble I guess. I will get by the best I can. And more than anything I will just enjoy this time away with my husband.

Saturday morning weigh in

I'm not sure if I like going to weigh in on Saturday mornings or not. We had people over last night and I felt like I TOTALLY had to watch myself the whole time. OK, it wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't done what I had earlier.

My oldest daughter needed to be at a birthday party at 5. Our friends were coming over at 5:30-6. Aleena and I left the house at 4:30...quick stop at Target to pick out a little gift and pick up a couple extra things for the night. All is well except I forgot that the party was way the heck out in Parker!!! I totally forgot where they lived...I thought it was about 10 minutes away. NOPE...with traffic it was like 30 minutes.

So I get Aleena there late. They were fine with it...she was fine with it...but I knew I had to get back home in total traffic...and still finish getting stuff ready for the night. The 2 couples that came over are very cool and laid back so it was no pressure to impress them. I just hate inviting people over then not even being there when they arrive.

So what did I do that was so bad? On the way back home, I am stressed out. I am starving. There is a new bag of chips SCREAMING to me to indulge. I managaed to stay out of the chips while Aleena was in the car. But as soon as I was alone...it was too tempting. I thought I'd just have a couple. YEAH RIGHT!!!

I didn't finish the bag. But I really did eat a TON of them on the way home.

The good news? I wasn't hungry for dinner so I didn't eat anything but salad with a little fat free dressing.

But I did eat some dessert. I had a little apple crisp (that I made with my home canned apple pie filling...YUMMY!!!) with a little low fat whipped cream on top. I totally didn't eat a brownie (from a mix...not as tempting! LOL) or any ice cream, though. I tried to drink lots of water to compensate for all the chips, too.

All in all, I did have a loss today. Only .6 but that does put me over the 30 pound mark!

I really can't believe I've lost 30 pounds. That's a lot of weight. And I feel so good knowing that I have done it by changing my eating habits, the way I think about food, the way I think about exercise, the way I think about ME! I've done pills and quick diets in the past, but to me those aren't long term things. I gained the weight back...and I didn't know how to lose it again without those fixes.

Now I feel like I have tools to maintain this loss and lose the little that will come with a vacation or holidays or even another pregnancy. (Did you hear that? That was my mom's heart stopping!!!) Not that any of those things are planned...but if they happen, I feel like I could cope with them and not just be totally fat again.

This has been a hard week. I finally succumbed to my little girls' cold. It's no wonder when Emma was crawling into bed with me at 5 am because she couldn't sleep and then coughed all over me for the next hour! Anyway, it has been a miserable summer cold. Congested, achy, sore throat, earaches, even. I am finally feeling better today though. So after the flu last week and with this cold, I haven't been getting out to walk. I really miss it, too, so I am hoping to get back out there tomorrow for a good walk.

Happy weekend all!

monday, monday

It was a good weekend. I posted quickly on Saturday morning that it was a busy day and would only be getting busier. I was in the midst of making strawberry jam and preserves and a marmalade and freezing strawberries. I spent about 4 hours on Friday night "putting up" strawberries. Then I was at it again Saturday morning for another 4 hours or so. I finally processed the rest of my second batch of strawberry preserves (or as I like to call it "Heaven in a Jar"! lol) on Sunday morning. This is the first of many weekends that will be spent in the kitchen putting away fresh produce for winter.

Last summer we joined a CSA. It has been an amazing experience. We go to the farm once a week during the summer and help out in the barn getting things ready for the weekly distribution. Then we bring home a bushel or two (or often more) of whatever was harvested the day before. My kids had so much fun just running around outside. And D and I really enjoyed the hard work and learning about how organic family farming works.

We also were able to can and freeze a lot of things to put away for fall and winter. It was a lot of work. One weekend we froze about 50 ears of corn. That means we blanched them all (put them in boiling water for a minute or two, then put them in ice water), D cut all the corn off the cobs and I put it in Food Saver bags and vacu-sealed it. That was just one weekend of corn. We did that a few times throughout the summer. It seems I was always canning green beans, too. Then there was the zucchini. We got really creative in how we used it fresh, and then I just started shredding it and freezing it in 4 cup bags so I could make bread or zucchini pancakes all winter.

And don't get me started on how many pickles we did last summer!!!

The amazing thing? We ran out of corn in February. I have 4 quarts (2 meals' worth) of green beans still in my basement. We have just a few jars of pickles left. I have 2 loaves of zucchini bread in the freezer left from the last bag of zucchini that we froze. And our only jam left is peach that we made last September. We really used what we put away.

I'm wondering how WW will go for me this summer when I am so very busy in the kitchen for hours on end like that. Friday night I really just ate a piece of salmon that D grilled for me. I never even sat down, just picked at it on the platter while I was hulling strawberries. I probably ate more salmon than I intended to that way. But I never even sat down. Not a good thing, I know, and really not the norm for me. But the 3 oldest kids were on a sleepover so the 3 littles were eating hot dogs and berries for dinner at the picnic table. I do get a little (LITTLE?!) OCD while I am in the kitchen like that. I am just in my zone about getting stuff done and the next batch started.

So how will I do with staying with my plan for summer when I am snapping and canning green beans for an entire Saturday morning? Or making pickles for 3 days straight? I don't take/make the time to eat well while I am doing my kitchen stuff. Will I be able to make good (fast and easy) choices? Will I take the time to really track my daily points? Or will I just be winging some days? And will winging it work as a method to lose the last 13 pounds I want to lose?

I have thought about switching to CORE for the summer. That way I wouldn't have to worry about tracking points at all...other than a few weekly points here and there. On the ohter hand, could I give up my weekend bagels or daily lunch wraps? I don't know. I have a couple more weeks to figure things out. I know things really started getting crazy last year around the beginning of July with making pickles. Then again, we are going to pick more strawberries on Saturday morning, too. I have a few more jam recipes I want to try! LOL

Oh, Kathy. Yep, my hair is naturally curly like that. Good thing, too, 'cuz I am really lazy about doing my hair!

new pic

busy week. busy day. will only get crazier as summer progresses I think. more about that later.

Today I was down .2! Not a gain, thank GOD!!! But still .2 from 30 pounds. Oh, well. I'll celebrate that next week when I can stay for my meeting! LOL